Dear Beyonce, Please Come Get Your Stans

Dear Beyonce,

Hey, girl. Hey. I hope this letter finds you in the best of health and spirits, being the best you you can be and all that. Or at least taking a little breather after your performance on the Billboard Awards show last night, right? I didn’t see it because I was editing some pictures and partaking in the quality Black cinema that TVOne was offering the people last night. They have some good shows! You should watch that channel sometimes. At any rate, I heard you did a great job and I’ll be sure to watch the clip on one of these blogs within the next few days.

Now, I know you’re busy with your new album about to come out and all, but girl, we need to talk. We need to talk about these people that call themselves your “Stans”. You remember that song “Stan” by Eminem? That’s where the term came from, but if were you, that would make me nervous. The “Stan” in that song became so obsessed with the artist he idolized that he ended up kidnapping his girlfriend, throwing her the trunk of a car and drowning her or some such foolishness just to get attention from their biggest star. We have got to stop speaking such horrific energy into our lives!  I don’t ever want that to happen to you! Anyways, back to your Stans…you really need to talk to them.

I don’t know if you know this or not, but your Stans are a malicious, acerbic group of people who actively seek out to verbally abuse and assault ANYBODY they perceive to have made even the most minimal slight against you. The BeyHive/Beyonce Army are rude, nasty and ignorant, all in the name of their love and admiration for you, Bey. I’ve seen cyberbullying that would make you cry when it comes to your Stans, girl. It’s sickening. They call folks names I am too ashamed to even repeat to you. You know what I think every time I see a BeyStan go after someone in your “defense”? I think “What Would Beyonce Do?” You seem like such a sweet girl, I know you wouldn’t approve of that type of behavior. Look how diplomatic you were when my ignorant boyfriend Kanye West jumped out there on that lil’ white girl that time! So kind and lady-like. How can your Stans claim to admire you so much and not adhere to your exceptional social graciousness? Attacking people and cursing them out in blog comments sections and via Twitter is not the way of a genteel Southern Lady, which you so clearly are. If I were you, I’d have a real problem with bullies claiming to represent me. I don’t think the ugliness I see from the Beyonce Stans is the Beyonce Way at all.

You need to put a stop to this. I think if YOU spoke out against this, they would listen. They claim to be a “hive”. You are the Queen. The Queen Bey. They have to listen to you or else they contradict their entire movement. Make them prove their TRUE loyalty to you, Beyonce. Maybe you could make a YouTube video to your overly aggressive fans telling them to behave better that includes some role playing as to demonstrate what exactly you would do if someone made disparaging remarks to you. If you do that, be sure to use your Serious Voice or else they’ll think you’re just kidding when I think you both can agree that this is NO LAUGHING MATTER. I think that would work. I know for a fact that all your Stans enjoy videos. Another option for spreading this message of representing you well could be writing a letter and have bloggers post it for you.

I’m writing this to you because I’m not a Stan of yours at all. I’d never align myself with a group such as that. I am a fan of good music and I think you make some good music (although, I don’t like your new single, at least not yet; still love “Dangerously In Love” though!). I like your style and you give good performances. Your wig collection is beyond impressive, you have a smart and capable husband and you seem to be doing alright for yourself in your career. What’s not to love? You’re A-OK in my book, Bey. I just think you should use the tremendous influence you have over your Stans to encourage them to get their minds and hearts right. They aren’t doing anybody any favors with that nasty behavior, least of all you. I will admit that those people make being a fan of you and your work very difficult. I’m often ashamed to say out loud that I like you!  People automatically equate liking Beyonce with being some out of control, vitriolic fanatic that will cut their head off if they even said they didn’t like the nail polish that you wore one day. “Crazy In Love” indeed! This needs to be rectified immediately and I believe you are the one to do it.

Hugs, Love, Wind Machines n’ Onsies,



PS~ Also, tell them to stop picking on your sister Solange just because she isn’t you. I really like her a lot.



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  • Rissa

    “PS~ Also, tell them to stop picking on your sister Solange just because she isn’t you. I really like her a lot.” Why did that make me laugh out loud? I love Solo-even my dad loves her!

    Seriously though, I always thought “stans” were a bunch of teenagers with nothing to do looking to just start shit on the Internet. Some of these people are OLD acting the fool! If it’s not my family or something getting me paid, I can’t be bothered arguing on the Internet with people over someone’s opinion. Especially someone who likely could care less should they actually see it.

  • Cheekie

    *faints under this blog post because it is just that glorious*

  • Funkystarkitty50

    Yeah, I love Beyonce too, but I don’t worship her like some of her fans do. It is extreme to the point of being obsessive and psychotic. I wonder if some of these people would stalk her if they could??? I remember saying something about like Rhianna and Kelly Roland–some automatically told me that I wasn’t a “real” Beyonce fan–WTH??? It’s not that serious…SMDH**

  • Alovelydai

    P.S.S Please tell them it’s okay to critique your work. Critique does not equal hate.

  • Tee

    I agree wholeheartedly!! My goodness, they make people who like her (like me- I’m a fan and don’t like that song either) look real back. If I knew her crew, I would send this letter to them. I’m all for passing this along.

  • ChrisAlexander

    Look. I was nodding mmmhmmm-ing all up and through this shit. It’s kinda sad, the idea of bashing the next artist as if it elevates or benefits your favorite. i mean, I am one to go hard at Ashanti fans, but that is not rooted in my personal belief, but actual fact: she is garbaj. So, there’s a diff. lol

    well-said Auntie.

  • Luvvie

    Pretty doggone murch! Beyonce stans are the worst. They act like Bey’s gon judge them on judgment day. Chile…

  • Gwendella

    Omg you hit the nail on THEE head. Everyday someone from my timeline has to fight them off. I love this post and hope that she can see this cause it makes no sense. To tell someone who tragically lost her nephew that at least B can hang with hers was the lowest of the low. Great post.

  • Ashley

    I like Beyonce but I’m not a Stan..actually I thought that that term came from combining “stalker” and “fan” and not the Eminem song (at least that’s what another blog told me)

    Anyway, Bee’s stans make me not want to like her and they make me want to keep the little bit of praise I have for her to myself. These people kill me coming at others saying “You’re not a real fan” b/c they didn’t like two songs on a album of twelve

    Lady Gaga and Justin Beiber stans are just as bad

    I REALLY just don’t get how you can argue with someone you’ve NEVER seen before behind a computer screen about the talent/drive/etc of someone who only knows you exist b/c of album sales

    I LOVE Luda but I’m not a Stan. I realize that everybody isn’t going to feel the same way about him that I do. and that’s perfectly fine. I only argue with my friends over him and that’s b/c they do it to get a response out of me. People on YouTube comments, Twitter, fbk, etc I don’t have time b/c I DON’T KNOW YOU LIKE THAT to be arguing with you over someone I’ve only met one time

  • nOva

    Please PLEASE do not hate on our successful, influential Black heroes!!!!

    (which is something a stan would say.)

    • ill Mami

      What a nOva thing to say.

  • Sadiqua

    Thanks so much for putting into words what I want to say almost every day! The crazy thing is, people with a thimble worth of talent have stans too, just as bad as Queen Bey’s. I have had words with Ciara stans. Ashanti stans. Rumor has it, Lil Mo has a professional Twitter stan.

    Have 354.9 seats.

    That little cd you bought with the minimum wage Mickey D’s job you have is a billionth of what matters to Beyonce. She is not coming to your baby’s church dedication, she is not going to hand you your high school diploma, she damn sure aint giving the eulogy at your funeral or signing her name on your rent check. She is an entertainer. I have plenty of folks I could hypothetically stan after, but I have better things to do. Hopefully, by the time these stans hit 30 (because I refuse to believe anyone over that age is stanning after her. i hope.) they will realize she is human just like us and she truly dont give a damn about you cussing a blogger out on Twitter in her defense.

  • coffie03

    well put-you don’t need my 2 cents

  • I Am Your People

    You came for Beyonce stans? *pour out likka for the PBG* It was nice knowing you *sniff*

  • Drew-Shane

    They make it hard to actually like. I love her to death but the stans make it hard. She’s not perfect with my love. You can’t really say too much about her.

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